lightneverfades:

beahbeah:

confuzzeldmind:

WHOEVER BUYS THIS FOR ME WINS MY ETERNAL LOVE

I OWN THIS
EVERY MORNING HE SAYS SOMETHING DIFFERENT ABOUT HOW THE WORLD NEEDS YOU AND YOU HAVE TO GET UP
AND WHEN YOU PRESS THE BUTTON TO HUSH HIM HE SAYS “DEFTLY DONE, MADAM,” OR “IF IT’S NOT TOO FORWARD OF ME, THAT DID TICKLE, MADAM”
IT WAKES YOU UP WITH THE SOUND OF CHIRPING BIRDS BEFORE STEPHEN FRY’S VOICE
EVERYONE SHOULD HAVE ONE

THIS IS LIKE JARVIS. 
A REAL JARVIS EXCEPT HE’S A CLOCK.

magnumclassics:

the moment of absolute and utter despair when u have to wiggle the wire to get ur phone to charge

(via dutchster)

konorai:

kurakos:

learning languages is fun until i gotta do it for a grade

Learning new things in general is fun until I have to do it for a grade

(Source: kouaoba, via itsgayerinenochian)

bloomin-eck:

efferescent:

remember when a girl from my school wore a dress the same color as the green screen at prom

image

oh yes

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her date did too

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That is actually kind of awesome. 

(via iwillburnyou)

honourcall:

porrim-some-sugar-on-me:

usbdongle:

significantmelancholy:

nevver:

Where you feel it

bringing this back because important 

#the cold crotch of contempt

"I hate that guy so much he makes my dick cold"

You ever been so ashamed, you turned into spiderman?

aatroxop:

toastradamus:

shipping is disgusting you should all be ashamed of yourselves

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image

image

(via iwillburnyou)

hi:

to everyone with finals and exams and big projects due very very soon and haven’t started anything yet

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(via itsgayerinenochian)

achievementpooper:

you okay?

jaclcfrost:

stormer-me:

jaclcfrost:

[forgets what to say or doesn’t know what to say in a conversation] [glances off to the side] line, please

ugh yes. I suck at conversation

are you sure that’s the line

+